


Sugar We're Going Down

by minghaohao



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst, Jicheol, JungCheol, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-07
Updated: 2016-09-08
Packaged: 2018-08-13 19:16:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,999
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7983121
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/minghaohao/pseuds/minghaohao
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The soulmate AU where every lie your soulmate tells you appears on your skin.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**the soulmate au where every lie your soulmate tells you appears on your skin.**

Jihoon stared down at the coffee cup between his elbows, resting his cheek in the palm of his hand. No real thoughts had entered his mind for the past few hours, he was in a daze as he stared at random things for no real reason. It was no later than 7 in the morning, which was actually sleeping in for the music composition student. With a deep breath, he inhaled the earthy scent of the long since cold drink. He slowly dipped his chin to his chest as he rubbed the inside of his forearm mindlessly, the phantom sensations of the previous night leaving scars upon his skin.

 _Jihoon had found it odd that Seungcheol was the one leading them up to Jihoon’s apartment. It probably wasn’t that unusual given that Seungcheol had been there a handful of times before, enough that he could know the path there if it were necessary, but never before under the pretenses of what was going to happen. It still felt out of place. Seungcheol had his hand firmly circled around Jihoon’s wrist as he pulled him up the stairs, holding on as if he were a skittish deer that would tuck tail and run at any given opportunity._  
_Perhaps he would have._

Standing up from the table with a sigh, he placed the untouched drink in the sink to be attended to later. Maybe when - no, if - he got his emotions in check. Jihoon wasn’t one to ever let things get to him if he had any say. He tends to put up a wall, “The Great Wall of Jihoon” he would mentally refer to it. Few people got to see beyond the wall and experience what lay beyond, because under that thick exterior was a boy who was sensitive and exposed.

_Seungcheol shut the door and quickly locked it. He was taller than Jihoon, so much so that as he approached the younger he felt like he was towering over him. Jihoon cowered, curling in his shoulders on himself with the effect of making himself appear smaller. Vulnerable. He took shy steps backwards, matched with Seungcheol’s confident steps forward. Soon he bumped into his bedroom door. Seungcheol was just a mere breath away, their lips sharing the same miniscule space. Their lips touched for not the first time that night, nor the last._

After looking at the sink which was mostly empty save for a few eating utensils, he looked to the dirty sheets and clothes that filled up his laundry hamper. As a college student, he wasn’t exceptionally lazy - he preferred to consider himself average in that regard. How many college students do you know who are organized and neat? He kept up on things. Did the dishes before they grew legs and ran away, vacuumed before the dust bunnies could conquer his home, and only sometimes would the laundry overflow to the point where he wasn’t sure what the floor looked like beneath.

_The way Jihoon’s back arched could only be described as something breathtakingly beautiful. His fingers were curled in the tresses of Seungcheol’s hair, tugging when he managed to use his tongue in a way that made Jihoon’s toes curl. It was a sensation he hadn’t experienced before, not this amazing in the least. Nothing had ever felt so memorable and monumental, it would be emblazoned in his mind similar to the marks etched down Seungcheol’s back._

Finding himself no longer in his laundry room but instead in the bathroom, he leaned against the tiled wall. The cold permeated through what thin clothes he wore. He slowly sunk down, slow enough that he could feel each rivet between tiles along his back as he made his way down. His fingers returned back to his forearm, the skin concealed by a thin long sleeve shirt. He traced his fingers in the shape of letters, before digging his nails into the fabric as hard as he could manage. Had the cloth not been there, he surely would’ve drawn blood. Warm tear drops slid down his cheeks.

 _“Oh god, oh, Seungcheol I’m so close, ah!”_  
_“Just a bit longer, baby, I’m right there with you.”_  
_The room was as hot as an oven._  
_There was nothing but warmth and love between the two of them._  
_They were both climbing a mountain, just about to its peak - and together, they saw the sudden blinding white light._  
_“Oh Seungcheol…” Pants and heavy breathing filled the air._  
_Eventually, a long moment of silence._  
_Even longer._  
_Had hours passed?_  
_“Jihoon, I love you.”_  
_“I love you too, Seungcheol.”_

With an outraged cry, he determinedly stood up. He furiously removed all of his clothing, revealing pure and unmarked skin. No bruises, no scars, no birthmarks or tattoos. To most this is a rare and precious thing, considering that every lie your soulmate tells you becomes forever branded into the skin. No bruises, no scars, no birthmarks, no tattoos, and most importantly, no lies.  
Correction - No lies for the previous 20 years of his life.  
He peeled his shirt off and over his head, looking into his mirror at his full exposed body.  
There was only one thing that stood out to him. Directly on his wrist for all the world to see, in big thick letters: _Jihoon, I love you_.


	2. Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The soulmate AU where every lie your soulmate tells you appears on your skin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had only intended for this to be a one-shot but my friend Stealthfire planted some plot seeds in my head, so you have her to thank for this :p  
> Thank you to everyone who read the first part to this, I was so overjoyed when I read all the comments from last night, I honestly hadn’t expected to get so many! Here I am at work at 8 am and I’m smiling to myself because hearing that you guys liked my story really means alot to me. Thank you all again <3

Jihoon has had his tattoo for one week.

It wasn’t a voluntary one, he didn’t go to a tattoo shop and pick out some meaningful design, no - his soulmate was the one to thank for it.

A simple lie was all it took, the words appearing on the skin where they would stay forever. There was no removing them, there was no way to take it back. Maybe the lie could one day become truth. The mark would always remain. You can give forgiveness, but the lie stays forever.

 

_It was partially through autumn semester, near the end of September to be more exact. Golden leaves were falling from the trees and decorating the ground._

_“Hey, Jihoon, look!” Jihoon’s best friend, Kwon Soonyoung, pointed across the courtyard on their campus._

_He of course followed where his finger directed, furrowing his brows at the scene before him. “Isn’t that Seungcheol?” Soonyoung asked._

_“Yeah, that’s him.” It wasn’t a secret in Jihoon’s friendship circle that he had a major crush on the older engineering student. Jihoon and Seungcheol had shared a history class that past spring. That was how they met, and later became friends. Lovers. Soulmates._

_Soonyoung elbowed Jihoon, earning a pained “ow” in response. “But who’s that girl he’s with?”_

_Jihoon looked in closer. “I don’t know, maybe it’s some ditz from a class they share. He’s gay anyway so it doesn’t matter. I’m the one he’s going to end up with.”_

 

It has been one week.

A week of pacing and denial, of guilt and shame. He attended his classes and tried his best to not fall behind. However his insomnia had increased over the past seven days and made his life even more of a living hell. He found it harder to concentrate, harder to listen and focus. His thoughts were everything and nothing, Seungcheol and emptiness. He had never once been more insecure in his whole life.

Eventually, he had given up. He was exhausted.

In the span of this one week, he and Seungcheol had not talked. They didn’t have any classes in common, and he rarely crossed paths with him on campus. They shared a text every now and again, sometimes going a while without any communication. This wasn’t unusual, everything was okay - or so he tried to convince himself.

He couldn’t let his soulmate slip like sand between his fingers. You only get one soulmate in this world, if you even get one. He could feel the determination boiling inside him. The words on his arm were evidence enough that he had a soulmate, and it was Seungcheol. And Seungcheol didn’t love him.

 

_Jihoon opened up his school email account._

_Vote here for the homecoming court!_

_He scoffed a bit - it was just a popularity contest, nobody cared about the merits each person had. Because so many people attended their college, they submitted applications to a board with staff at the college. Whoever had the best social life got picked._

_For some reason that he still doesn’t know, he clicked the link._

_He scrolled down and skimmed through short bios about each candidate, each full of sports and clubs and “volunteering” that he was sure was all falsified or at the very least exaggerated. He stopped when he saw a familiar face._

_Shoulder length auburn hair, chocolate eyes, and the smile of an angel._

_Yoon Junghan._

_But… She wasn’t a girl. She was actually a he._

_He narrowed his eyes, honing in on the paragraph describing this “Junghan” ditz._

 

Jihoon was not one to let an opportunity go unwasted. If he could get Seungcheol to fall for him, get him to say “I love you” again and not have the words appear upon his skin… He could only imagine the excitement that he would feel. He would be the happiest man alive, without a doubt.

Ready to patch their relationship and pave the road for bigger, better things between the two of them, he sent Seungcheol a text inviting him to come over the next day for coffee.

Seungcheol accepted the invitation.

 

_“Hey Jihoon!”_

_Jihoon looked up from his ipad to see Soonyoung jogging over to him._

_“Hey, did you see this?” Soonyoung extended his phone, showing Jihoon the same email that he had read the day before._

_“Yeah, I saw it.”_

_“I think you’ve got some competition man. He’s a pre-law student, Jihoon. He’s going to be a lawyer! He’s going to take showers in twenty dollar bills!”_

_Jihoon looked away, crossing his arms to hug himself while he felt his insecurities closing in around him._

 

Looking in the mirror, Jihoon looked like shit. He felt like it too.

So he did what any sensible person would do - take a handful of sleeping pills and hope for the best.

He slept for 15 hours.

The sleep was restful and helped lift many effects of his sleep-deprived lifestyle. The bags under his eyes were still present, but smaller and not as dark. He didn’t feel cranky or angry, or that he might snap at any given second. He felt refreshed, and he had a clear mind. Looking at the clock, it was 11:42 in the morning. Seungcheol would be over in just a few hours, and maybe they could talk about what happened.

 

_It was October 10th when Jihoon felt his heart crack._

_The day could almost mirror the events that took place just a few weeks prior. Leaves coated the ground. Jihoon and Soonyoung were sharing their lunch, although today it was rather quiet. Instead of chatting and Jihoon ogling Seungcheol, the only thing he could manage to do was stare lasers into Junghan’s head._

_Why was he so special? What did he have that Jihoon didn’t?_

_Soonyoung could tell his best friend was distressed, in kind terms._

_“Why don’t we go inside? It’s getting a bit chilly and we should probably go claim a spot for the winter anyway…” Soonyoung trailed off, his eyes trained on the same scene that Jihoon was seeing._

_Seungcheol was kissing Junghan._

 

A quick sniff to his shirt revealed that a shower was very much so needed. He cleaned up and readied himself for the day. After he washed away the sleep and tiredness, he dressed himself to impress. Their relationship - whatever kind it was at this point - was on thin ice. If he messed this up, that could be it for him and Seungcheol.

It was uncommon but not unheard of for soulmates to end up being with other people.

 

_The day was November 7th. It was night time, dark and chilly outside but Seungcheol’s arms around him were warm. Their breaths could be seen in the cold, trembling out through a helpless smile. He and Jihoon hadn’t talked much since Seungcheol and Junghan started spending more time together, although this information was not so well kept from Jihoon. Jihoon had heard about a hip hop gathering at a bar near campus, and he knew that Seungcheol was fond of that kind of music. He was surprised when he said yes, and he couldn’t wait to see him again._

 

Looking at the clock, it was 1 pm. He decided he should probably cook something for breakfast, so he made frozen eggo waffles. He watched some comedy shows to help pass the time, waiting for Seungcheol to come before he started the coffee.

 

_November 7th was the best and worst night of Jihoon’s life._

 

He was startled when he heard knocking on the door, having momentarily forgotten the time. He quickly got up and dusted himself off, making his clothes neat and turning off the tv. “Coming!”

He dumped his syrupy plate in the sink on his way to the apartment door, taking a much needing steadying breath before he opened it. “Hey Seungcheol, come on in~”

 

It was was eight days now past the incident and Jihoon could face Seungcheol. He could tell him his feelings, he could repair their relationship. It would be fixed. They would be happy.

After all, they were made for each other.

“I haven’t started the coffee yet, so let me go put it on.”

Seungcheol comfortably slid into Jihoon’s couch while he waited, arm resting on the back and relaxing as if everything was fine.

Standing in the kitchen waiting for the coffee, he pulled up the sleeve of his shirt. Looking at his left forearm, he only saw smooth, unmarked skin. Using his forefinger to rub at the soft skin, he could feel the thickness of the caked on foundation. It concealed all of the imperfection that lay beneath, not a single black letter seeped through the make up and maybe he could pretend it wasn’t there.

He rolled his sleeve back down when the coffee pot beeped, pouring two cups and taking it to his living room.

After setting the cups down and getting seated himself, he held his hands together on his lap. “So… I kinda wanted to talk to you about something.” Jihoon started, sitting up straighter before he continued. “I’m... just curious, what’s your relationship with Junghan?”

Taking a sip of the coffee, Seungcheol let out a hiss when the steaming hot liquid hit his tongue. He set the cup down, before narrowly looking into Jihoon’s eyes at the seemingly accusing question. “What does Junghan have to do with anything?”

Jihoon hated Seungcheol’s intimidating look, so much that he glanced away. “I would just feel wrong. I noticed you two spend a lot of time together and with what happened last week I don’t want to interrupt something. I don’t want to cause drama.”

Seungcheol cleared his throat, leaning back against the cushions of the couch. “It won’t cause any drama.”

“Can you just do something for me?” Jihoon asked, not pleadingly.

“What’s that?” Seungcheol responded gruffly. He wasn’t as alert as he had been just seconds ago, the threat of asking the wrong question apparently gone.

“Can you look me in the eyes and tell me you don’t love him?”

“Oh, Jihoon,” He chuckled, sitting up more so he could look him in the eyes. “I’m not in love with Yoon Junghan.” Seungcheol smiled brightly, it even reached his eyes.

So did Jihoon.

 

Looking at the clock, it was near midnight. Seungcheol had come and gone hours ago, the sun having fallen and darkness overrode his home. The only light was from his tv, playing a late night talk show that he had muted. He stared blankly, unmoving for hours.

He was scared, terrified even to look at his body. Expose what might be underneath.

He couldn’t sit on the couch forever though, as much as he loved staying in limbo. He felt as if he were a scientist and this was like the Schrödinger's cat, but of tattoos.

As he walked to the bathroom he had the same feeling of dread he did much like a week prior. Pulling off his clothes, he saw no new words. He hopped in the shower and scrubbed the foundation off of his inner forearm, revealing words that he wouldn’t mind cutting away. He checked his chest, both arms and his legs - still no signs of any lies. He felt an immense amount of relief and joy. Maybe Seungcheol couldn’t take back the lie about loving him, but perhaps the lie on his arm would become truth.

He stepped out of the shower and started drying off. He couldn’t contain the joy coursing through his body, his smile unwavering. Whipping the towel up to dry his damp hair, he knocked his phone off the counter. “Oh, shit.” He bent down to pick it up, making sure it had no cracks in the process. As he stood up, out of the corner of his eye, he saw something black.

Thinking it was something behind him, he quickly turned around. He was faced with nothing but the bathroom wall. “This is some creepy horror movie shit or something,” with a shrug, he returned to drying off.

But then, it dawned on him.

He was shaking with dread and panic and it took him a couple tries to open the camera app. His fingers decided they didn’t want to work anymore. He turned his back to the mirror and used his phone to snap a picture. Surely enough, there was a smidgen black on the back of his shoulder blade. Zooming in, he started to recognize words. His heart that was once just cracked was now shattered as he read the words aloud: “I’m not in love with Yoon Junghan.”

Sometimes things that are broken are best left unfixed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the part where you comment how you liked it~

**Author's Note:**

> This was a lot more angsty and depressing than I intended it to be X3  
> All comments and feedback are greatly appreciated, thank you for reading and please enjoy <3


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